This morning I was getting ready for work and I had the news on hoping to catch the local weather, while my oldest son was sitting on my bed waiting for me to fix his ‘bed head’ when a news update came on about a case of child abuse that was reported last week.
This case is about a young girl, around five or six, who had been found in her own home, kept in an old crib with a piece of wood over the top of the crib forming a sort of crude cage so the girl couldn’t get out. If that weren’t bad enough, she was starving, naked and covered in her own filth. To make matters worse (if there could possibly be anyway to make that happen) there was a one month old baby boy also found in the house, although this child was loved and cared for because he was clean and well taken care of. Luckily, the girl is at a local children’s hospital recovering, well beginning the long and arduous journey of recovering both physically and mentally. The update this morning was saying that the parents were due in court to get their attorneys appointed for them. After I listened to the update, I was thinking to myself, “I really hope they bury these two under the jail instead of in it.” when my thoughts were interrupted by my ten year old son asking why someone would treat their children like that little girl was treated.
How do you answer a question like that, posed to you by your ten year old who has known nothing of love and support and thinks that taking away his Nintendo DS is one of the worst things in the world that can happen to him? It took me a minute, which was apparently an eternity to him because as I was thinking of an appropriate answer, I was asked, “Well mom, did you hear me?” I told him that, yes I heard him but it’s not an easy answer to give because I don’t know how other people think. I also can’t really answer that because different people handle situations differently, and that no one may ever be able to answer the question as to why some people make wonderful parents and why other people should not be allowed to have children. He seemed satisfied with the answer I was able to give him, basically that I had no idea why people do what they do, to some children. This is one of the reasons I fully believe that you should have to go through some sort of screening process before having children.
No, I’m not joking…you have to have a license of some sort for anything you want to do. Want to build onto your house? Got to have a license. Want to drive a car? A boat? A motorcycle? You need a license. Want to own a pet from the shelter? Not only do you have to have a license, but you have to fill out enough paperwork to seem like you’re joining the military. Want to get married? Guess what? You’ve got to have a license. If you want to open a business, fish, hunt, clear or burn land you’ve got to have a license. But you want to bring the miracle of life into this world? You want to be able to influence another human being while being financially and emotionally responsible for that person? You want to become a teacher of rights and wrongs and mold and shape a member of the next generation? Guess what? You don’t need a license to do that, which makes absolutely no sense to me at all.
Sure, most people make wonderful parents and are the types who are fully involved in shaping their children’s future. But there are those people who have a much skewed vision of how parenting is supposed to be carried out. I think if people want to have a family, that is great, but there should be some type of practical exam given to see how they’d perform in any given situation.
For example, one practical could be your 15 month old baby is sick and won’t stop crying and has been for hours and you are at your wits end. How do you cope? Me personally? I’ve had to put myself in ‘time-out’ to take a breather, collect my thoughts then deal with the situation. Unfortunately, not everyone responds that way. I’ve seen too many news stories about shaken baby syndrome and the most common reason the parent snaps is because the baby wouldn’t stop crying.
I just think before anyone is gifted with the responsibility of becoming a parent, there should be some sort of checks and balances in place to ensure the child isn’t going to suffer at the hands of an irresponsible parent.
* This post is not to offend anyone or place blame on any particular person. These are just my opinions.
Bestie I couldn't agree more! People should have to pass a test. Being a parent is something not to be taken lightly yet day after day we hear these things. Here recently the woman who drove into the river with her children, all perished except a 10 year old boy who escaped. Her family had the nerve to be upset because the father didn't want them burried with her. I will never for the life of me understand it!
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